Message in a Bottle

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Hello Stranger,

Stranger things have happened,
Taller walls have drowned.
Yours to mine connected,
To heights we must astound.

One cast into the currents
Waves friendship from the ground.
And ancient shores will empty
To send you and me home-bound. 

Tribute To A Soul Friend

A few years, I found a soul friend. He didn't know me, and I didn't know much about him. He was a star and I lived across the globe. But at our cores, he and I were made of something of the same substance. 

A few days ago, I found out he has passed away from a possible suicide. That soul-throbbing emptiness, I have felt before. 

You know the days when you look up at the stars and instantly feel your worries fade? Is it possible that we, as beings, are connected to the substance of another star? 

And one day, we look up and feel a dreadful emptiness and a hint of guilt. With no previous understanding that we ever connected with that one star, and no knowledge that the star is no longer there. Still we sit there, consumed by emptiness, feeling so whole and so empty, so big and so small, so ancient and so naive at the same time. 

I can't help but think that if only he knew I existed, that he had a soul friend, that we would both feel a little more whole right now. And this is why I do this. 

"I'm obsessed with making every moment of my life full of value and substance. I'm constantly fighting for miracle and adventure, and everyone around tells me to just enjoy life and stop fighting. Then I realized--I AM the adventure, and I AM the miracle. I'm fighting for myself and I will NEVER give up fighting for who I am. If the greatest adventure is life, and the purest miracle is this very moment, the what the hell am I even waiting for?"

Let's Play A Game

Me: Let’s play a game.
Him: I love it when you say that.
Me: It’s a psychology game I recently learned. Name your three favorite animals in order, and then three traits about each.
Him: Box turtles intrigue me because their lives and habitats are so distinctly different from other animals. They’re unique and still maintain a prehistoric air about them. Manatees interest me for the same reasons; they’re just so peaceful and seem to live with a grace that doesn’t match their physical appearance. Peregrine falcons are the epitome of predator in my eyes, but they can live in the middle of nowhere or in the bustle of NYC.
If I may, I’d like to hear your animals before you reveal the meaning of mine. See how accurate I am—about you and psychology.
Me: Taking my game and making it your own; how enticing. Mine are, respectively, the dragon for its majestic, magical, and all-powerful essence, the wolf’s sexy, fierce, and pack-loyal appeal, and finally, the hawk, for its divine, all-knowing, and free nature.
Him: I get the sense that every one of those adjectives applies to you.
Me: Your compliments are too gracious.
Him: I might see myself as a turtle and I definitely see the wolf in you. But in the end, we’re both birds.
Me: Does that mean we can fly away together? If so, I’ll race you.
Him: If we were birds, where would you want to fly to?
Me: We’d fly against the rotation of the earth, and challenge the laws of time.
Him: That might be the most attractive thing anyone’s ever said to me. I would be perfectly content to spend my life as avian time traveler. Join me?
Me: Don’t have to ask; just glance over beside you and smile back.
Him: Hillary, I am completely transfixed by you.
Me: If I ever fell behind, would you wait for me?
Him: Birds aren’t meant to wait, but some do fly in groups. As a hawk though, perhaps you’re meant to never look back. As for me, an endless journey with you is exactly the kind of trip I would enjoy most.
This was a conversation I had with a stranger many years ago. We never spoke after that.

"I forget what the weather was like that day; probably cloudy with a chance of emotion. All I remember is that it was windy. It was the type of wind that would blow your words in the opposite direction so they would remain eternally wandering in search of lips that would never part."

"The best moments in reading are when you come across your own suppressed emptiness. You stand face to face with a character in your book, a person you never met, someone even who is long dead--and you finally realize that the book is not what you've been reading."

Nature's Touch To Miracle

“That’s not what you want to tell me. I know that because it wasn’t direct at all.”
“Neither of us follow the crowd, which means that we’re destined to walk our own paths. And as much as I’m grateful that we crossed paths in our own spectacular journeys, I don’t think we share a mutual destination. My journey isn’t for anyone else, and I suspect yours isn’t either. It’s wonderful to arrive at certain check points and find someone there to share the excitement with, but one day I’ll find myself in a place that no one’s ever been, and I don’t know if I have the grace to share that with anyone. My journey is one that I have to walk alone. Only then can I arrive at where I’m destined to go. And I love you because you are the same way."
"You know, when I was younger, someone told me that the worst thing you can do to someone is say I love you then walk away."
"Maybe it’ll be the best thing anyone’s ever done for you."
"Sounds too cliché for my liking."
"That’s because no one who says it truly understands it. That’s one of the things I’m on my way to find."
"Then let’s find it together. We’ll walk there together, because you and I both know that it’s one we want to share with someone. When the time comes, we’ll part ways. You’ll never reroute for me, I’ll never reroute for you. You never slow down for me; I never slow down for you. When we part ways, we don’t look back."
"What shall I fill the gaping hole of your absence with then?"
“You know that you can fill the void with anything and it’ll be just as good if you let it.”
“Not everything is worth making a miracle into.”
“What are you so afraid of? You were the one who told me that everything in life is a miracle.”
“And I’m afraid of losing the natural touch to that miracle.”

One Star To Take It All Away

“How many stars does it take to carry our worries away--can one star take away one worry? If so, what happens when a whole sky full of stars can’t take it all away?
“Is it possible to be so noble that not even the stars deserve to carry the weight of your heart?
“At that point, do you continue staring at the sky and let it absorb whatever it can, or is it better to avoid the disappointment? For me, I feel like I’m betraying the stars when I stare up at the sky and can’t empty my mind. As if I can’t share everything with it—as if I’m keeping secrets.
“You think maybe we have a special connection with a star? That maybe we spend our whole lives releasing all our emotions to one special star. One day, the star dies and disappears, and we look up into the sky and feel only loneliness. We don’t even know why we’re sad, or that we are. And we never find out why.
“The stars are so many light years away. Maybe the sad souls are just the ones who have formed a special connection with a star that’s long dead.”
He didn’t answer any of her questions. Instead, he turned to her and asked,  “When’s the last time you heard the sound of your own breath?”
“What does it sound like?” she asked?
“The weight of the stars."

The Love We Don't Betray

"I believe in a romantic love that exists beyond the boundaries of the universe. One so strong that we don't have to worry about betrayal. And I don't want to stop searching for it."
"You mean within us?"
"I don't think it's fair to ask anyone to stop searching for it. Because if there's something better for you, I want you to have it. If this love was powerful enough and everything you wanted, you wouldn't have betrayed it. So why are we asking for a lifelong commitment? We all deserve a love that we'll never betray and even think about letting go of."
"I’m not letting go of us. If you want to, just let me know so I can hold you that much tighter."
"Why would you want to hold me tighter? Why not let me go? You can let me go without letting us go."